Asking for a Sign
Blog - Wednesday, March 22, 2023
I wanted to spend some time at my son Trevor’s gravesite today, as I was going to be speaking with parents of young people in active addiction this evening, at the same rehab that Trevor had attended. My topic was to be Fentanyl awareness and the importance of having Narcan, especially when their children returned home after treatment. The founder had reached out to me, sharing how the drug situation has never been worse in his decades in recovery, because of fentanyl, and how Trevor’s story would likely be helpful and powerful to these parents.
I had a good talk with Trevor while at his final resting place, speaking out loud instead of quietly today, really hoping he would hear me loud and clear. I thanked him for all the connections he continues to send to me from the other side, and I asked for his support in tonight’s space, as it was something new and likely triggering – but I knew how important the message could be.
I am finishing the book Signs; The Secret Language of the Universe that was given to me by my Angel Mom friend Bee, who said it’s her favorite. In the book, the author suggests asking for signs of our loved ones who passed, not just waiting for signs to show up. And she recommends being specific with what signs are wanted or needed. So – with this in mind, I asked Trevor for a sign from him to show he is always with me, and I asked him to send it to me through our dog Maverick who was at the cemetery with me that afternoon (as he often is.)
Maverick and I walked back to the car, and I didn’t notice anything unusual about Maverick’s actions, until we got to the car. Normally he’s happy to jump back in the car, but he didn’t want to this afternoon. OK, it’s been raining a lot lately and you haven’t had all the walks you’re used to, I agreed. I wasn’t in my usual rush, and I told Maverick we’d walk a little bit. Maverick led me directly to where he wanted to go, as if guided by another leash – and I was delighted with the beauty of the grassy field in the distance which he obviously wanted to visit. And when I got close enough to see what the flowers were dotting the green landscape, I immediately knew that Maverick had shown me Trevor’s sign.
The grass was FULL of daisies – tall, thick-stemmed delicate flowers perfect for making a daisy chain, as I often did when my boys were little. When we came upon abundant daisies in the grass, Trevor and Parker often stopped whatever we were doing, and asked me to make daisy chains. The boys often helped make the necklaces, and sometimes asked for their own flowered adornment to wear, but always insisted that I wear a daisy chain that we had made.
So – when I saw the daisies, I knew Trevor was showing me this symbol of our shared love; precious memories we had made together. And I sat down and made myself a daisy chain right then and there at the cemetery, as Trevor had asked me to do from the other side. Sharing gratitude to our loved one is important when receiving a sign, I had read, and I did tell Trevor Thank You for his beautiful sign to me as I threaded the flowers together.
I also learned in the book Signs is that signs should not be kept quiet, but should be shared. The author comments that some will be skeptical, seeing these “signs” as merely coincidences, but to us who believe, we know they are a message from the other side. And I believe.
PS The fentanyl talk went devastatingly well, with some parents desperately needing the resources I shared, including a prescription for Narcan. I could feel Trevor’s presence and guidance there with us, for which I am so very grateful.
-Trevor’s mom Michelle